Minimum Wage Ninja

Listening to old Jim Rohn seminars has been motivating lately.  His message is good, but I always get uncomfortable listening to things like this.  Something I've picked up on is that people are paying attention and laughing during the jokes, but they are not doing so during the serious parts.  It makes me uncomfortable.  One of my favorite sayings of Jim Rohn's is that it is not available to you by affirmation, it is available by labor.  That is how I feel as I go about my day putting in as many extra hours as I can during the holiday season.  Yet these people aren't even doing the labor of paying attention in the first place.  Am I just fooling myself when I think that all the paying attention I did during lectures in class is what I should have been doing?  Results are what matter, and these people did become successful enough to afford motivational seminars.  Another thing I've been doing that cuts into my sleeping time is reading a book called "Winning&quo

I'd like to set the record straight about something called the 4% rule. You see the 4% rule basically says that after you retire it is safe to withdraw 4% of your principle each year and never run out of money (which completely ignores the never touch your principle rule). My imaginary friends like to ask me, Minimum Wage Ninja, what do you think of the 4% rule? Well I think it is better than the 50% rule.  But it is worse than the 1% rule.   You see cash is king, and having a lot of money sit there is great and all. But kings can only move one square.   Dividends Are Queen.   You can take the cash from the dividends and move them anywhere that you like. That is power.

There is this theory that I remember reading before.  I think it might have been Peter Drucker. Basically people are either becoming incredibly intelligent knowledge workers with high wages, or they are becoming incredibly strong physical labor workers with low wages. I've been mulling this theory over in my mind as I fantasize about achieving financial independence in the future. Its like the workforce is becoming an hour glass with the high paid people on top, a few in the middle, and the lower paid people on the bottom. Now the highly paid people on top do not have time for you, because their time is valuable.  They have to put in the extra hours to stay on top of their field. Likewise the lowly paid people on bottom do not have time for you, because their time is valuable.  They have to put in the extra hours just to make the ends meet. But the guy in the middle?  They don't necessarily have to improve to get to the top, nor do they need to put in so many hours.

The bitcoin appears to be some sort of opportunity or bubble or something.  But I really have no idea what it is.  And until I reach Financial Independence I really have no business looking into it. jlcollinshnh over at his website has a post entitled  The Market Always Goes Up.   So I go to work for minimum wage and buy whatever DRIP plans I can.  That plan I understand.  That plan I can follow.  Do not get distracted by the gimmicky gambles.  The bitcoin could go to a million tomorrow and I'll be okay.  Back before the 2009 market collapse I remember seeing these ads on how easy it is to buy and flip houses.  Now I'm seeing all kinds of bitcoin ads on how easy it is to buy bitcoins and sell later when they increase in price.  Perhaps I'll lose some money by not gambling on something I know nothing about, but its better than losing sleep on it. 

"My name is Maximum Decimus Meridius, Commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true Emperor Marcus Aurelius, father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife, and I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next." stated Maximus in the movie Gladiator. "That's great, but then what are you going to do?" said noone ever. Like seriously, I have no idea what life after early retirement will be like.  All that I know is that my goal is worth fighting for, fourteen hour days at minimum wage is NOTHING compared to real battle.  It is my blessed OPPORTUNITY that I can work those long hours to get to early retirement.  "And then what?" you ask.  And then what!  I'll tell you what, I'll have earned my life.  I will live. Gladiator Movie Clip: Gladiator

I'm not going to pretend to have read or understand the 400+ pages of proposed tax changes.  So I'm getting my information from other news sources. There are a lot of people complaining that the tax cuts benefit the rich more than the poor. They say poor people save like a $100 bucks while rich people save $10,000 bucks or more.  The thing is I don't care if the rich people save a million dollars in taxes.  If it means that I get an extra hundred dollars and don't have to pay it back elsewhere, then that is my gain.  Quit being jealous of the rich, and mind your own damn business.  There is no reason to compare your gains to other people's gains when you are still getting a pretty good gain.  $100 bucks is still many hours worth of work that I am about to save, it pays to look at the actual effect of the tax cut instead of the perceived comparative effect of the cut.

I've been reading articles over at  https://notalwaysright.com/ .  They have a multitude of customer service related stories.  As an ex customer service supervisor for a large retailer, I thought I would enjoy reading these stories.  However I was wrong, the people in these stories are absolutely horrifying.  Just to clarify incase you didn't know, its not ok to lie.  Its not ok to steal.  Its not ok to be unethical or treat people like trash.  That's not to say the authors of these stories are in the right either.  I can't quite put my finger on it, there is something that angers and depresses me while I am reading these stories.  These customers would not be allowed into my life, neither would many of the authors.  I find myself arriving at the uncomfortable conclusion that although many stories are entertaining and nostalgic, I should not read them.  I will not allow this nonsense in my life, not even by just reading about it.  Instead I'll spend my b

I've heard that a significant percentage of people who win the lottery end up bankrupt. They simply did not have what it takes to handle the wealth that they were hoping to get. What brings these people down?  Is it a bad attitude that brings these people down?  Is it a lack of resources other than finances?  Is it a lack of a support system?  I don't have the answers, but I do see this as a  serious and important question. This is important because we have all won lotteries.   I've won the time lottery, this being the greatest time in the history of earth to be alive. I've won the genetic lottery, because clearly I'm smarter than the loser who passed me driving down the road this morning. I've won the country lottery, having been born in a country that other people risked life and limb to get to. I've won the physical health lottery, because I can still walk, talk, and take action. Despite all this?  I'm becoming bankrupt in hea

If you are going to improve your health, then diet as much as you can. If you are going to improve your finances, then make as much money as you can. If you are going to make love then put those illicit movies to shame. There are many losers who try to justify their self destructive actions by claiming that everything should be done in moderation.  But ya know what? When I quit smoking I threw the cigarettes away and never bought them again.  I was wrong to have smoked my health away.  Maybe at one point it was the right choice, but when crap hit the fan I had to discard that which made me weak and unable to deal with the stresses of life.  All the cigarettes had to go.   Because this is important, I will not hold back.

I have heard many people say that you shouldn't try to time the market. So being the contrarian that I am, today I'm going to try and time the market. By the market I mean the New York Stock Exchange.  It should open around nine thirty and close around four or so.  But we'll see. If everything goes as planed there will be six and a half hours to buy as much ownership of companies as I can.  It is a good time to buy no matter which hour I purchase more ownership in.  This is because, as J.L. Collins puts it,  the market always goes up.

I'm guilty of falling into the trap of thinking that people can retire early.  That simply isn't true. Retirement happens when you've earned enough passive income to cover your expenses.  Age has nothing to do with it.  You are now working because you want to, not because you have to. There is nothing early about retirement. This was on my mind due to the recent article that claims because people are living to be over 100 years old, it should be law to push back the retirement age to 70. It is insanity to think that people want to spend their longer lives on working for the man.  Its like they just don't understand what motivates people to live longer lives at all. Here is the reality and I'll say it again, retirement happens when you earn it.  Some earn it as a teenager by being a trust fund baby.  Some earn it in their 20's or 30's.  Some in their 60's.  But don't let anyone take that away from you.  There is no way that I am working long

I've been listening to  Steve Job's commencement speech.   He talks about how he was privileged enough to have his parents pay for his college, but since college wasn't doing for him what he thought it would, he dropped out. Wow, just wow.  I mean how many immature losers would have simply kept going on their parents dime?  Count me as one of them. My favorite quote from the entire speech is, "Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose.  You are already naked.  There is no reason not not follow your heart." This man even recognized that his life is a privilege, which is truly amazing. Another man that didn't take his privilege for granted is Joshua Kennon. On his personal blog he  posts about advice privilege  that he received from his parents.  He tells about how that privilege helped to liberate him in his life. Yet another person I know pushes her beauty capital privilege

I'll just come out and say it, I do not give money to charities. Luckily there is an internet between the reader and myself, because if I were to say this face to face I'd quickly lose any respect from the person I'm talking to. Yes there are good causes, and yes in the future when I can afford to give then I will. But while I'm stuck down here in povertyville making minimum wage I have absolutely no business doing it. Its like trying to provide a place to sleep for a friend.  First of all I gotta build the financial house up before I can help them. There are some people who give 10%+ of their money every week, and it just baffles me. "But I only give whatever is extra." Listen, until you are financially independent there is NOTHING extra.    Every single dollar needs to go towards building your financial house. It may feel good to help someone else's family.  But if it comes at the cost of my own family, then its a no go. Wish my charact

When I was drinking a beer, the rich were out there getting richer. When I was chasing skirts, the rich were out there getting richer. When I was playing games, the rich were out there getting richer.  When I was educating myself, the rich were out there getting richer. When I was at church, the rich were out there getting richer. When I was learning how to defend myself, the rich were out there getting richer. When I was trying to impress my boss, the rich were out there getting richer. When I was fighting the punk who elbowed me in a basketball game, the rich were out there getting richer. When I was just surviving, the rich were out there getting richer. That's what they do.  Its time to seriously consider what I'm doing and why it ain't getting richer.

There is a disturbing trend I see among the self help books. They are all full of BS phrases like "you've got to make a choice to get rich," or "if you're in poverty it is because you didn't want riches enough." Just shut up. I didn't sit down and make a choice to live in poverty.  I choose to do the right things to get rich. I didn't sit down and make a choice to be fat.  I chose to do the right things to be fit. I didn't sit down and make a choice to be single.  I chose to do what I was supposed to do to be popular. And I sure as heck didn't sit down and say "Gee, today I'm going to be as irresponsible as possible and hurt myself and my family as much as possible."  Heck no. So if you got nothing better to say then "You control your own actions" or "You chose to have a heart attack" then just shut up.  Quit writing books.  Quit giving speeches.  Go away, you're not helping me. Yeah I kn

I've heard it my whole life, that you go to work for a good company, and then that company is supposed to take care of you and your career.  The good paying job is there because as you look after your companies wants, they look after your wants. But I just haven't encountered it yet. When I worked at Walmart I saved them over $140,000 in shrink and made them over $150,000 selling additional items to customers that wouldn't have otherwise thought to buy the items.  What did that get me?  A forty cent raise. While working at my current job I've saved them over a quarter million dollar in inventory that would otherwise have been scrapped.  I've put in no less then 60 hours a week for over a year and a half and never missed a second.  This has also got me a forty cent raise. So no, doing a good job will not get you rewarded.  It will not move you to early retirement.  It just doesn't matter how much money you make someone else, they will not give you any cut

My mother always said that I needed to go to college to get a good paying job.  My father said that he wouldn't give me a dime to go to college. It was the next mandatory task that I was supposed to do.  I had a meeting with my guidance counselor and the dean of admissions of an in state private school.  They promised me that if I went to their college and graduated that I would be able to get out of poverty.  That just by graduating the college would give me a good paying job in my chosen career field.  And due to my many scholarships, including a full ride, the college costs would be covered. But it was a lie.  The college took my scholarship money and never applied it to me.  The college didn't teach me what I wanted to learn.  The college never gave me a job.  All the college does for me is to call me up and ask for donations.  That is reality. They are there to make a profit off of you, because they think young people without their crap together is the easiest prey.

There is one thing that we all need.  Everyone is doing it.  If you go without for a few days, then the desire to get some will overwhelm you. That thing is drinking water. Now most people wrap their water up in a plastic cup.  But have you considered using your hands?  If not, then it is time to unleash the beast.  There is something mindblowingly primal about drinking with your hands. The correct technique is to clasp your hands together like you've just clapped.  Open them 45 degrees and dip them in the water.  Quickly bring that water to your mouth as fast as possible!  Be refreshed.  Build that arm strength.  Enjoy life. The math is supportive of this.  A good plastic cup will run you like a dollar at the discount store.  Yet that same dollar if invested for 100 years at 10% will end up being $13,780.61.  That's enough money for a solid gold cup! $73 dollars invested at 10% for 100 years will end up being $1,005,984.70.  That's over a million dollars!  Now th

For days I've been watching the Dave Ramsey Show video clips on Youtube.   I really hate this stuff.  There is nothing worse then hearing the story of someone who does not get what they had coming.  I played by the rules, I did things the right way, yet I didn't succeed and don't have any hope left of doing so.  But these people who screwed off all their life and got into over half a million dollars in debt are given the opportunity to turn it around within a few years?  What about us people who did everything correctly, why's that not my opportunity huh? Perhaps its a character default of mine.  But who cares? What I've come to realize while watching this show is that life is fair to these people after all.  Sure they screwed up.  But they also did what they had to do to get out of their messes.  I suppose that's fair.   It is amazing how many people appear to not actually be aware of the decisions that they are making.  They chose to give up the

I'm going to share the masterful two account plan.   All you need for life is two accounts.  One account is a savings, and the other account is a checkings. The purpose of the savings account is to hold your emergency money.  Find a penny on the ground?  Put it in the savings.  Pawn some stuff?  Put it in the savings. You want to pretend this money doesn't exist.  Don't let anyone know about it.  Its only purpose is to handle the emergencies that pop up, such as going to the hospital. The other account is the checking's account.  Everything else in your financial life should go through this account.   Got paid an insurance claim?  Put it in the checking's account. Sued someone and won?  Put it in the checking's account. Need to pay rent?  Pay them from the checking's account.   Got a paycheck?  Put what you can in the checking's account.   Need to buy groceries?  Only if there's money in the checking's account.   On

This is so simple I can't believe nobody ever thought of it. The easiest way to have a positive net worth is by not owing anybody anything.  Kinda like the homeless man on the street corner. You see loans are evil creatures, designed to shackle your balls and hold you back from doing what you want to do.  You want to go to the bar and chase skirts?  Too bad, you got work to do to pay them student loans off.  You want to have a nice dinner without cooking?  Too bad, you are obligated to work and get that mortgage paid off.  You want to go out in the woods with your collection of throwing daggers and practice hitting every target that you find?  Too bad, your time is obligated to working so that the people who loaned you money can get paid back and feed their own families. To take money without intending to pay it back on time makes you a thief.  Being a thief means you must have your hand chopped off.  Having your hand chopped off makes it harder to get laid.  Protect yourself

I got a low credit score.  Who cares? Either they'll loan me the money or they won't. It appears that the reason my credit score is low is because I don't have a credit card. I'll gladly sacrifice your imaginary credit score number if it means that I never have to deal with real credit card debt hell. But what about the flying miles?  And the rewards points?  And the 1% cash back!!! Screw it. Perhaps some elites have the self control to benefit from those tools.  But not little ole me living down here in povertyville.  I'd buy a 70" T.V. with that thing. So forget your credit nonsense.  It ain't worth it.

There I said it.  Up there in the title.  This post is done. This is not advice, but do as I say. I only put my money into stocks.  They have the highest return out of most of the asset classes. If you want a better career or want to start a business, then you may dabble in those fields. But at the end of the day when we're still taking home minimum wage, ya need to turn to your old faithful friend.  The stock market.

Dollar cost averaging is where you invest the same amount every month, no matter what. Because we need another financial obligation.  Gonna do great for my stress levels. Forget about it. Just buy everything that you need and want, then invest the rest. Last paycheck I had twenty bucks left over.  So I invested twenty bucks.  If I win the lottery next month and have a million dollars left over, then I'll invest a million.  If my tax check comes back and I have a thousand dollars left over after buying everything that I want, then invest the thousand. Forget plans, forget stress, and forget obligations.  Just do whatever you can.  Compounding will go to fight for you.

These are the top twenty myths about retirement. Not really, because ya know, everyone knows what retirement is. That's when ya quit your crappy job and do whatever you feel like doing. No myths there. More specifically retirement is when you no longer need to sell your time for money. Ya get that way by just getting started.  No matter how small the amount, compound interest will step up to fight for you. I believe it was Albert Einstein who said that compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world. That guy was pretty freaking smart.  If he thinks compound interest is number eight in the world, then ya best be taking advantage of it.

There is one secret to saving money that will change your life forever. Buy a washcloth. There it is, that is the secret to success. "Now wait just a minute." you might say.  "How am I supposed to get rich by buying a washcloth?" Well I'll tell you. From now on we will refer to it as the shit rag. The purpose of the shit rag is to replace your spending on toilet paper. Seriously throw all that toilet paper away.  From now on use the shit rag. "But wait just a minute." you might say.  "That thing will be dirty." That's why buckets were invented. If you want water then you better get used to scattering buckets around your yard and waiting for it to rain.  You should only be taking showers in the rain anyways. Now that you have buckets full of water you can use one to wash out your shit rag. The important thing is that you're not spending money on toilet paper. Money saved = money invested. There are more ways

Wow there is so much great facts at this website. - The median annual wage is 36,200 (summary page 33). - Those who make between 8,000 and 31,000 a year fall in the second 20% of society, or put another way, from 21 to 40%.  They have $42,000 in income, pay $7600 in taxes (summary page 35). -  Those in the second 20% claim $38206 of disposable income, yet consume 50,750 dollars worth (summary page 38).  Only the top 20% have more disposable income then consumption.  (summary page 38). - 29.8% of the people are obese (summary page 39) -The second 20% have $145,000 in assets and 32,000 in debt, meaning that us minimum wage earners have an average net worth of over $112,000!  (summary page 47). Consuming roughly 50,000 worth on a minimum wage paycheck is not even close to my experience. Neither is having over a hundred grand in net worth.  How do you all do it?

If you give a man a fish then he will eat for a day, however if you teach a man to fish then he will eat for a lifetime. The only problem is, I really don't want to eat fish anymore. I was taught to get a good paying job, and then the authorities and leaders in my life would look after my interests.  But what really happened? The supermarkets are full of poison. Education never once taught how to manage money, or how to have a healthy diet. Work grants you a forty cent raise. Till death do us part ends with high divorce rates, and leads to a fifty percent loss (or more) of capital. Your fishes are all toxic! Yet there are good things out there. The standard of living is high. The luxuries like water and electricity are nice. You have the right to speak out against the government and not worry about dying. So if all these good fish are out there, then why are all the fish that I'm being given toxic? It is because you cannot trust your authorities.  They are

I work 60 hours a week and on my own initiative I correct millions of dollars in mis-charged inventory. So when I heard that raises were coming I got excited.  Finally I would be given my due for all the hard work that I've done.  My boss surely sees the excellent work that I do and will reward me, right? Forty cents.  That is all the raise was.  Meanwhile everyone else in the factory has gotten so many raises over the past two years that a person can have no experience, no qualifications, and get hired on full time to make more money then I make, even after the raise. So now I"m conflicted. When I found out I was so angry that I couldn't even speak.  I've given two years of my life to becoming a valuable member of the business, and the guy doesn't even value me as much as someone new off the street?  IF I PUT THE COMPANY INTERESTS FIRST, THEN THE COMPANY BETTER RETURN THE FAVOR AND PUT MY INTERESTS FIRST. Yet a part of me is thankful for the forty cent ra

The final number it takes to become financial independent can seem daunting. You mean I need $300,000 for early retirement?  I only gross $30,000 a year, how can I ever amass such a high number? However this number is misleading, thanks to the rule of 72. The rule of 72 states that if you take 72 and divide it by the rate of return, then you'll have an approximation of how long it will take to double your money. The stock market returns roughly 10% per year.  Therefore 72/10 = 7.2.   It'll take roughly 7 years to double your money. That makes things seem much more doable, The rat race is only to $150,000.  After that you don't have to contribute another dime, all you need to do is sit on your behind for seven years while your retirement builds itself. It feels good knowing that once I reach $150,000 the maximum amount of time until retirement is 7 years.  I'll keep contributing though, so it should be shorter. Why 300,000?  Because 300,000 times .08% yield

There is an old mathematical problem that goes something like this: A lily pad sits on a pond and doubles in size every day.  If it completely covers the pond on the 3,650th day, then on what day did the lily pad cover half of the pond? Answer:  The lily pad covered half of the pond on the 3649th day. That is the pain of investing towards early retirement.  Compound growth is parabolic and a ton of it happens at the end.  Hurry up and wait for that moment.

The other day I was told that I should invest money into VTSAX. It was a well intended suggestion, so I decided to look into it. As of today, according to Morningstar, VTSAX is an index fund that owns over 3500 positions in stocks. Holy crap! If I can't even value one company and pay fair value for it, how do they expect me to know and value a basket of over 3500 of them?  This is insanity.  This is stay up all night worrying insanity. Thank you Coca Cola for being so simple. Before you tell me Coca Cola is not so simple, that's exactly my point!  If you can't agree that a company like coke is simple to value then how can anyone value and obtain a fair price for over 3500 of them? Disclaimer:  I don't own VTSAX as of this writing.  I do own KO.

There are only three things you can do to get to early retirement quicker.  They are: earn more, spend less, and get a higher return on your investments. 1.  Earn more.  Let's get real here, if I knew how to earn more then minimum wage ninja wouldn't exist.  It would be called median wage ninja, or slightly below average wage ninja. 2.  Spend less.  Being cheap does not allow you to retire early.  How can you get more cheap then living on minimum wage?  (I'm looking at you, paid survey websites). 3.  Be smart and get a higher return on your investments.  This is the way that minimum wage earners must take.  Right now there is an opportunity out there to double your money.  For example Bank of America was trading around $12 a share around the Brexit buying opportunity, now after Trump has been made President of the United States the shares have skyrocketed to over $24 a share.  That's twice as much.  Beanies Babies, gold, housing, hot wheels, sports cards, shorting

My grandfather served this country in the military. Yet he does not get any retirement dollars because the military claims that the records which shows his service were lost when the building holding them caught fire and burned to the ground. He had over twelve years of service, and is only credited with one year. Despite obtaining letters from his previous officers attesting to his service, he is not allowed to reestablish a claim to the years that he endured in the military. After he left the armed forces he became an officer of the law.  When he left his job he was given six thousand dollars in retirement pension.  That is total dollars. He claims that the entire police pension was in Enron, and they lost it all when the company went belly up. This man can barely walk and is over seventy years old.  After two highly successful careers he has little to nothing to show for it. With no disrespect, I don't want to end up like that. When I invest in an individual comp

I'm not an enviro-mental, so I don't go out in the wilds too often. Thus it was exciting to take a stroll through the parking lot during lunch. What strikes me as odd is that everyone's vehicles were in mostly good shape. If people were truly acting out of a desire to hurt others, then all the windows would be shot out, all the doors would be keyed, the tires would be slashed, etc. Thats just not the case. When I worked as a Customer Service Manager at Walmart I used to marvel at the 95% of people.  None of them were acting in their own best interest.  In fact they would frequently act against it. For the life of me I could not understand why, until I came across Charlie Munger's mental models. People do not act in their own best interest.  People do not act for money.  People do not act for entertainment.  People do not act out of a sense of justice.  Instead the brain causes people to take 'short cuts' in their actions.  People are just running s

Our parents used to clock in at nine and leave at five.  They had what is called a day job. At my job I clock in at six and leave at five.  Despite all the so called advances in society, things have gotten three hours a day worse for me.  That's eighteen hours a week.   If it takes 10,000 hours to master a skill 1 , that means I master roughly one less skill per decade then my parents did.   Should I take the traditional path to retirement of working from the age of twenty until the age of sixty, then I will have at minimum four less skills by the time I retire. The skills that I will cut out are not the bare bones necessities.  Instead the skills that are cut will all be entertainment and hobby skills.  By the time I reach sixty I will not know how to enjoy myself.   I only foresee this getting worse for future generations.  Will the next generation work a three to five job?  How about a midnight to five job?   This is why early retirement is so important,

One day the Grim Reaper is coming for you.  He will retire you, and your job.  There is no escaping his career ending aspirations. Your job is to cheat Death. Time is money.  Every dollar saved towards early retirement is additional time spent doing whatever it is that you want to do. Here is a fun way to think about it.  Standard retirement age is 60.   If you save ten days worth of expenses, then you will be able to retire ten days earlier than 60.  If you save ten years worth of expenses, then you will be able to retire at 50, and so on. Just keep pushing forward your retirement date until it catches up with your age.  Then you are financially independent. Just like death, do it quickly.

One of the perks of moving from a manual labor job out in the warehouse to an administrative assistant job in the office is that I'm able to listen to whatever I want as I perform my job duties. One of the websites that has caught my attention is the Mad Fientist.  There are currently thirty three podcasts on his website, and I've listened to the first twelve.  While the podcasts themselves don't seem to offer much by way of specific and actionable advice, it is nice to have a list of early retirement players.  This podcast series is sort of an introduction as to the who's who of early retirement. The three biggest takeaways so far are: 1.  Hyper focus on one activity to build wealth at a time. 2.  Online sites can sell at extremely low multiples. 3.  Measure invested amounts by percentage. Despite the low multiples of online websites, I'm going to stick with investing in the common stocks of good dividend paying companies, because it is my one activity to

We are the cashiers at retail stores. We serve your food and fix your car.  We smile as the customers yell at us and we laugh when the boss tells another lame joke.   Yes, we are those who make near minimum wage.  And one day we will retire and you'll never see us again.   Retirement is not only for the elite individuals who make an unfathomable $50,000 a year.  In just ten years we will have purchased freedom over our time.  We are the minimum wage ninja.